Andi's Sermon :)

In our church they ask people to give talks during the main meeting and this Sunday it was my turn! I was excited because I got to talk about the blessings of being married and what it means to be an eternal family. I love this topic and hope you enjoy :)

One of my favorite doctrines of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is that of eternal marriage. I don’t think I’m supposed to have favorites but since I’m imperfect anyway I do. Eternal marriage is one of them, tied with the doctrine of Christ and the Plan of Salvation. Think of it: If we are righteous we are saved through the Atonement of Christ and we get to live forever in the presence of God. That’s miraculous! That tells us three beautiful truths: 
1- Death is not the end. There is a life after this mortal trial and we all get to live forever.
2- Jesus Christ atoned for our sins so that we could live again in the presence of God if we are righteous here on earth.
3- We have a loving Heavenly Father who wants to be with us again after this life.
Those three truths are beautiful. They are an essential part of most Christian faiths and bring hope to millions of people every day. That alone gives hope to a world full of sorrow and misery. Now add to those key beliefs this thought; after we have been resurrected, proven worthy through the Atonement of Christ, and entered into the presence of a loving God and Father we not only get to live for an eternity but we get to spend it with our family and our spouse. Doesn’t that just make sense that we would get to spend eternity with the person and the people who we loved most on this earth? Why else would Heavenly Father create such a strong bond on earth if He didn’t intend for that loving bond to last through the eternities? 
In his book Stand for Something, President Hinckley illustrates how God intended eternal marriage to be an essential part of His plan for His children on earth: “How wonderful a thing is marriage, a plan provided in the Almighty’s wisdom for the happiness and security of His children and the continuity of the race. He is our Creator, and He designed marriage from the beginning. At the time of Eve’s creation, “Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh:…Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Genesis 2:23-24). As Paul wrote, “Neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord” (1 Corinthians 11:11). Surely no one familiar with the holy writ can doubt the divinity in the institution of marriage.”  
President Hinckley goes on to say “The marriage relationship encompasses the most sacred of all partnerships. The sweetest and most reassuring feelings of life, the most generous and satisfying impulses of the human heart, find expression in a marriage that stands pure and unsullied above the evils of the world. Such a marriage is the desire—the hoped-for, the longed-for, the prayed-for desire—of men and women everywhere”.
As Ben and I have adjusted to life together I have seen some of the most beautiful marital relationships both in and outside of the church. There is a simple joy that is felt by people when they talk about their loved ones. I remember walking in the park with my friend Aurora. Her husband, Alessandro is Ben’s boss at ULB and they are both extremely dedicated to their research here. As I walked with Aurora we lagged behind Ben and Alessandro as they pushed the children around in the strollers. I looked up at the two of them walking and talking about who knows what then turned to Aurora and asked “Will he (Ben) ever figure out when to take a break?” She smiled and responded “No, Alessandro still hasn’t figured that out.” We both laughed a little and the looked ahead of us to our two little nerds and even though the next five minutes were spent planning a way to lock their computers up for a week both of our eyes sparkled with such loving pride. She loved her nerdy over-achieving husband, you could just see it in her eyes. 
I have seen that same bright love in the eyes of my dear grandfather. My grandpa Schofield is probably the most amazing human on this earth. He is a brilliant, humble, righteous man who quietly blesses others every day. I look up to him as an perfect example of what it means to be a believer in Christ and felt impressed to ask him about his views on eternal marriage. He wrote:
“My parents were married just after Dad returned from his mission. He had served in Australia and Mom met him in San Francisco when he returned. They were married in the Salt Lake Temple. I always knew I wanted to have a Temple marriage, but when the time came there was no question in my mind. Marguerite and I had gone to a show in Farmington and when it was over we drove down to Shiprock and back talking to each other about an hour’s drive. We learned a lot about each other. We had known each other less than a month and had dated two or three times. I put my arm around her and kissed her goodnight and asked her to marry me. We were married in the Meza, Arizona temple and had a wonderful life together raising our five kids. After LaMont was born, things went downhill very fast so far as her health was concerned. She was diagnosed with bone cancer which affected her whole  body. Both hips broke while she was flat on her back in bed. Her pain was intense. As I held her one day, her eyes brightened for a moment and she grimaced a couple of times and was gone. We had a little over eight years together. I knew then what I still know, if I am worthy she will be mine again.” My grandfather’s eyes still sparkle when he talks about his beloved Marguerite. He loves her dearly and shows the same love to my grandmother every day. Of her he writes “Gaye is a different story except the ending is the same. She was Jr. Sunday School coordinator in our Branch. She and the kids fell in love faster than I did. There was one girl who was intent on us getting together. She was a wonderful lady but a pain in the neck (a classic example of my grandpa’s ability to make everyone seem amazing). When she gave up on me , things worked pretty fast. I remember dancing with Gaye at a Branch dance. I had a sore on one of my gums so I left my teeth at home. Barbara caught Gaye and told her “you don’t have to marry Al, he doesn’t have any teeth”. Well it’s been 56 years since we were married in the Salt Lake City Temple. A couple more years and we might just make it work. Your grandma and I have a deep and abiding love for each other. I think that a deep and abiding love for the Savior in our lives has been one of the things that has kept our marriage strong. We have had our share of disagreements, but with our deep love we have worked these out. We can be one in purpose, one in core beliefs, one in almost everything and still have our own unique personalities. I love my sweet Gaye with all my heart and I know that if I can keep myself worthy she will be mine throughout eternity. Eternity to me is these to wonderful wives and our many children with their mates and children.” I’d like to thank my grandpa for sending that beautiful account and portrayal of love and devotion. I know that he strives hard every day to be worthy to live forever with his sweethearts. 
Eternal marriage is something that the Lord teaches us throughout the scriptures.  From the beginning of time God planned for husband and wife to be partners in this life and eternity. “And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should beaalone; I will make him ban help meet for him.  And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a awoman, and brought her unto the man.” (Genesis 2: 18, 21-22).  In his epistle to the Hebrews Paul wrote “Marriage is honourable in all” (Hebrews 13:4) And in the gospel of Mark the Savior himself said “But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a aman leave his father and mother, and cleave to his bwife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath ajoined together, let not man putbasunder.” (Mark 10: 6-9).
In that last scripture Christ is speaking of an eternal marriage one that is performed with the correct keys and authority. “The Savior Himself spoke of this sacred marriage covenant and promise when He gave the authority to His disciples to bind in heaven sacred covenants made on earth: “And I will give unto thee the keys of the kindom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven” (Matt. 16:19) ” 
This scripture is referring to the priesthood keys given to Moses and Elias during their time here on earth. These keys were used to perform sacred ordinances in the temple which included marriage ceremonies but had been lost due to the unrighteousness of the children of Israel. In the next chapter of St. Matthew we go to the transfiguration of Christ and read: “ And after six days Jesus taketh aPeter, James, and John his brother, and bringeth them up into an high mountain apart, And was atransfigured before them: and his face did shine as the sun, and his raiment was white as the light. And, behold, there appeared unto them aMoses and bElias talking with him.”(Matt 17: 1-7) Here, in the presence Moses and Elias, Christ restored the priesthood keys to the earth and bestowed them upon Peter, James, and John. These restored priesthood keys made it possible for couples to be married and sealed together in the holy temple of God for time and for all eternity.
After Christ’s death and the death of his ordained apostles the keys of the priesthood were once again lost to the children of God. The apostasy and dark ages took away the plain and precious truths of Christ’s gospel and holy Temples along with their sacred ceremonies which sealed spouses and families here on earth and in heaven, were destroyed. The promise of eternal family was gone until the gospel was once again restored to this earth. 
Said Elder Robert D. Hales “In this latter day the promise of eternal families was restored in 1829 when the powers of the Melchizedek Priesthood (the priesthood held by Moses, Elias, and Christ) were restored to the earth. Seven years later, in the Kirtland Temple, the keys to perform the sealing (marriage) ordinance were restored, as recorded in the Doctrine and Covenants: “Elijah the prophet, who was taken to heaven without tasting death, stood before us, and said: “Behold, the time has fully come, which was spoken of by the mouth of Malachi testifying that he [Elijah] should be sent, before the great and dreadful day of the Lord come—To aturn the bhearts of the fathers to the children, and the children to the fathers, lest the whole earth be smitten with a curse— “…The keys of this dispensation are committed into your hands” (D&C 110:13-14, 16).  With the restoration of the keys and priesthood authority comes the opportunity for all who are worthy to receive the blessing of eternal families”.
I can’t think of any greater blessing than one of an eternal family. What a blessing it is and I love the invitation given in that scripture “all who are worthy to receive the blessing”. Brothers and sisters the place to receive this great blessing is in the house of the Lord. Only within the walls of the Holy Temples are these sacred ordinances performed. Therein lies our only opportunity to be together forever with the family and spouse we love so dearly. Russell M. Nelson said it best when he said “Celestial marriage is a pivotal part of preparation for eternal life. It requires one to be married to the right person, in the right place, by the right authority, and to obey that sacred covenant faithfully. Then one may be assured of exaltation in the celestial kingdom of God.”  I encourage our youth to be worthy to be married in the temple of the Lord. Don’t settle for less. You deserve the hope that comes with a marriage that lasts beyond the veil and the deep love that comes with it. Richard G. Scott describes the blessing of a temple sealing in these words “The temple sealing has greater meaning as life unfolds. It will help you draw ever closer together and find greater joy and fulfillment.” 
To those of you who aren’t yet married strive to be married in the temple. For those who are married but not yet sealed in the temple make it a goal to be sealed to your family in the house of the Lord. Insure that you will have the opportunity to become an eternal family by doing everything you can in this life. 
For those lucky saints who are already married I be grateful for your spouses. Tell them how much you love them. Live worthy of the covenants that you made in the temple and follow these four cornerstones outlined by President Hinckley. 1-Have Mutual Respect and loyalty to one another. 2-Use the Soft Answer. 3- Have Financial honesty. 4-Pray together. 
I echo Elder Scotts words “It is so rewarding to be married. Marriage is wonderful. I have no power to describe the peace and serenity that comes from the assurance that as I continue to live worthily, I will be able to be with my beloved and our children forever because of that sacred ordinance performed with the proper authority” I have a testimony that through the restoration of sacred priesthood keys we are able to live together forever as husband and wife and as families. I testify that no greater joy can come from life than the joy that comes from being married for time and eternity. That we may all be worthy to receive those blessing in our lives is my prayer in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Sources:

Hales, Robert. "The Eternal Family." Ensign. 1996: 

Hinckley, Gordon. Stand for Something. New York: Times Books, 2000. Print.

Nelson, Russell. "Celestial Marriage." Ensign. Nov. 2008: 

Scott, Richard. “The Eternal Blessings of Marriage.” Ensign. Oct. 2011

What!?! It's OCTOBER!

All I can say is...wow. There is a universal and undeniable truth to the saying, "Time flies when you're having fun" and this last month is proof of that.

In this last month I have flown to the USA and Budapest. I have taken a train to Dinant (cool city in Belgium) and Brugges. And I have driven to the beaches of Normandy and the castles of Rhine Valley. In this last month I have ambushed my brother's post-mission airport scene, caused my older sister Melissa to cry with joy (something not easily done), and spent three amazing weeks with my Mom, Dad, and little brother exploring and learning more about the beautiful countries I am blessed to live by. Some other side adventures include celebrating my 26th birthday which kicked me out of Europes "Youth" category for train rides and museums, celebrating Ben and my fourth wedding anniversary, and spending the first night alone with Ben since Brooklyn was born 16 months ago. What a beautiful month! And to wrap it up nicely I listened, with more attention than I ever have before, to the words of the Prophets and Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and gained a strong testimony and confirmation that what they counsel us to do is that true path to become more like our Savior and Redeemer Jesus Christ. As I said before, what a beautiful month!

There are a few thoughts that come into my head through all this retrospection and the first is this: Reuniting with family and friends is one of the most beautiful moments in a persons life. I mentioned ambushing my little brother Michael's airport scene before. For those who don't know he was gone on a mission for the LDS church for the past two years in Portland, Oregon and was only able to communicate with family via letters and e-mails except on Christmas and Mother's Day when he was allowed a phone call home. He was gone when Brooklyn was born as well as when we moved to Brussels and it seemed that so much life separated us.

Then an unexpected blessing occurred. Ben was required to present his PhD proposal to both his board at ULB and the University of Utah. He was also required to attend and present at a conference at the University of Utah to be held the same week that Michael came home. Through this fortuitous timing we planned his visit back to the states and through the generosity of my father we were able to fly home as a family the day before Michael came home. Nobody in my family, save my dad and my brother-in-law, knew we were going to be home for this special occasion and we determined to keep it that way until Michael got off of the airplane the next day.

I can't express the excitement that I felt as Ben and I weaved through people and telephone booths at the airport the next day. We felt so sneaky as we huddled into a predetermined corner and waited for Michael to come down the escalator to the baggage claim. I'd pop my head out from behind the corner to get a glimpse of my unsuspecting family and then quickly fall back behind so I wouldn't be seen. Ben sat in plain site confident that my family was too caught up to notice him, even though my brother in law took a picture of him smugly sitting there while my family waited for Michael. When the moment arrived we slithered through the crowd, ducking and dodging until I hid safely behind my fathers back. And, just as my little sister pulled away from her first Mikey hug in two years, I stepped out into the open and watched his face light up with a mixture of excitement, joy, and confusion. The look on his face combined with the rib-crushing hug I received afterward made the whole 32 hours of traveling home and back seem like a blink of an eye.

That week with back home was filled with so much joy. I got to spend time with Melissa and her new baby boy Kellen and my beautiful sister Kristina. I got to eat Cafe Rio with my best friend Cassie and spend time with Ben's sister Robyn and her outstanding daughters. My favorite memory though would have to be hugging my confused and excited family at the airport. The rush of emotions felt in seeing loved ones that we wouldn't have seen for six more months and the joy of surprise in planning such a fantastic ambush filled my heart.

The second thought I had this month is: Love is equally shared and given even if it seems unequally shown. My family consists of three girls, Melissa, myself, and Kristina and one lucky boy Mike. Growing up we were all loved in a way that fit our personalities. I, for example, was very athletic and competitive so my parents pushed me to be successful in sports and music. They endured hours of practices and lessons and sat through tons of concerts and games. Kristina is more dramatic and creative so my parents would calm her down after a bad day at school and love her even if what she was doing was not what they wanted her to do. Different people require different love. Growing up I never realized the different types of love that were given in my home. I was sure that my parents loved us equally and supported us in the exact same ways. It was only a few years ago when my family was enduring difficult trials that I realized the ways in which my parents loved each of us.

Then I became a mom... Let me tell you one thing that is very important for mothers to know, when you are a mom EVERYTHING is personal. Brooklyn is the third of four grandchildren. She came after Melissa's adorable Janie and mellow William. My child though adorable is not mellow. So anytime a harmless comment was made about Janie or William in comparison to Brooklyn I would tense. My mama bear would come growling to the top of my throat and get stuck in the same place maternal-morning-sickness would stick. It didn't happen much when she was younger and after we moved out here it completely disappeared until my parents came for a visit. Brooklyn was herself and most of the time all was well but occasionally, in a car or late at night in a hotel, her "fun-o-meter was pegged" (just for you dad) and she would express herself loudly like she does. Only during these frustrated times would her screams bother my parents and in turn their comments bother me.

The breaking point occurred when we were touring the impressive Marksburg castle along the Rhine in Germany. It was a cold, miserable day at the end of a five day roadtripping week. Brooklyn was tired and wet (and later to learn full of it, literally). So after about ten minutes of the touring with a screaming baby and receiving glares from everyone in the group I decided to take myself and Brooklyn out of the picture. I jumped into another group that was leaving the castle and hurried out as fast as I could. After changing her diaper and finding a place to sit down I just lost it. I felt like my parents expected Brooklyn to be like one of her cousins. I felt angry that they would compare such different children and situations. I felt hurt that even the grandparents got to glare at the screaming toddler. As I cried softly to myself while feeding Brooklyn bits of croissant I debated what  I would say to my parents. I imagined speeches I would give about treating the grandchildren fairly and about loving each of them the same. As I concocted this speech in my head I looked up to see my whole family coming towards me. I stood to meet them and confront them about their behavior in the castle only to be quickly embraced by my mother who held me tight and whispered "I love you", "I'm sorry". My speech disappeared from my mind, all the anger that had built up over every little comment subsided and tears filled my eyes because in that moment I knew that my mother loved me. I knew that she loved my baby girl just as much as she loved her other grandchildren. And I knew that she felt my pain and wanted to make it go away.

Love is shown in many different ways and forms and we fail to recognize it when we're looking for the love that someone has given to somebody else. On the ride home that day my parents talked about the differences between each grandchild. They told me stories about how each child had at some time driven he and my mom over the edge, I must confess I felt better when the stories were about Janie and William. They joked that grandparents get away with it when they become angry at grandchildren because the grandchildren only remember that "grandpa gives us poptarts". But most importantly they assured me that Brooklyn was special to them, they love her, and they know she is a beautiful and intelligent girl.

Parents, spouses, siblings, friends, children all make mistakes. The worst feeling in the world comes when we are angry at someone we love even when a wrong has been committed. The greatest regrets in life come from not showing love enough. The last thing I learned this month is: don't let petty anger overshadow life-long love. My family is not perfect because we are a family of humans but we love each other. To this day I have never seen a family so willing to forgive, so desirous to be close, and so eager to congregate than my family (I may be biased :). I love the time we spend together and I hate when myself or someone else lets silly mistakes get in the way of an enjoyable time. Something you realize when you live far away from home is how precious each moment is and to think that  I wasted a handful of moments being angry over something inconsequential is my only regret of their visit. If you have time with your family, make it beautiful. Count each moment as a blessing and most importantly let them know you love them. I love you Ben and Brooklyn. You are the guiding lights in my life and fill my heart with joy. I love you Melissa, Kristina, and Michael. I couldn't have asked for a greater group of people to grow up with. I love you Mom and Dad. You are the best parents in this world. Thank you for being such an important and beautiful part of my life. You all mean the world to me. I love you.